Remember me?
Your neighborhood blog slacker?
Yep, I'm back.
I realize that I ended the last blog with a cliff hanger. I know, I know … that was mean. Especially since the night that my husband and I spent on the ghost hunt is nothing more than a foggy memory. I probably couldn't even tell you what I was wearing that night. I do however, remember that it was a drizzly night and my hair looked like the before picture in a Garnier Fructis shampoo advertisement. But, I do owe you an ending. Bare with me as I try to recall (and quite possibly make up some crap) what happened in that death trap … I mean, lovely mansion.
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| Garnier Fructis before picture … AKA my hair twin. |
Twenty ghost hunters filed into the front door of the dark old house. The first thing that I noticed was a handsome fireplace in the far corner of the room. The fireplace really has no significance other than the fact that I wish they would have thrown a log and a match in the thing. My hair was kinda damp and fire dries stuff. The second thing that I noticed was that there was no electricity inside the house. I suppose that they did not want anything to interfere with the fancy ghost devices. And furthermore, nothing alive lived in the run down mansion ... ghosts do not need electricity. I'm pretty sure that they can see in the dark. Kinda like owls and alley cats.
Each person chose a battle buddy and hesitantly wandered off to a room in which they thought would create the best atmosphere for paranormal activity. Tom and I migrated to a large room at the top of the steps. I assume that, at one point, this room was a bedroom. As we entered the dark bedroom, I remember having a strange feeling in my gut. You know the feeling, the one that you would get just before you made your 7th grade oral presentation in front of the entire class. An oral presentation that you had not prepared for the night before because you were too busy watching MTV's Real World Los Angeles while talking to your BFF on the telephone about MTV's Real World Los Angeles. My gut feeling was a pretty good one, it was in this room where Tom and I would have our first experience with a "ghost". I'll get to that in a minute.
As our eyes began to adjust to the darkness, I realized that this room didn't seem scary at all. We pulled out all of our newly acquired paranormal detecting equipment. And wouldn't you know it, everything that the GPA had taught me about said equipment was gone. Gone like the lost souls that were watching me fumble with a seemingly useless handheld machine. Gone like the lost souls that were laughing at me but I couldn't hear them because I couldn't get my stupid hi-tech gadget to work.
In efforts to make the most out of the evening, I decided to ask one of the GPA's to help me with my machine. This time I would retain all of his instructions, find me a spirit and take a picture of him ... or her. The instructor looked at me like I was the village idiot when he flipped on the "on" switch on the back of the machine and said "Good to go, ma'am. Start asking some questions and see what you can come up with."
Two things are very wrong with that.
#1 … You shut your offensive pie hole with that "ma'am" garbage. I haven't reached an age where "ma'am" is appropriate (and if I have, don't tell me).
#2 … Did you say to ask questions? Me ... chit chat with a ghost? Hmm - I hadn't really thought of what I would actually say to a
So, ummm … you're dead, huh? I'm not.
I like your shirt … that I can't see. And your hair looks really pretty … in my imagination.
Got any great, great, great, great, great grandchildren that you'd like me to relay a message to? No? Cool.
What's heaven look like? Take that back … you missed that boat and decided to stay in this mansion to entertain ma'ams, emo kids and arrogant GPA instructors.
End of rant. Back to ghost adventures.
So, Tom and I were armed with several devices that were sure to corner a ghost. We had a flashlight that would cast green polka dots all over the wall, that way we could see the ghostly shadows walk by us. We had an EVP device, it recorded our every word … and supposedly the words of dead people. We had a Ghost Hunter Pro, this handheld machine was used to talk to ghosts, via a series of clicks and flashing lights. And last, but certainly far from least ... we had a digital camera (I do know how to use that).
Tom used the Ghost Hunter Pro while I manned the camera and the flashlight. He propped the gadget in a window sill and began questioning the air. "Is anyone there?" Our machine did nothing … no ghosts here. Time to bring in that arrogant instructor again and see if perhaps he could round up some frightening activity. He also started talking into the air "Is anyone there?" Our machine lit up, flashed, blinked and beeped like we had just won a new car on The Price is Right. Coincidence? Maybe.
We chatted back and forth with the ghost in the bedroom for several minutes.
This is what we learned about our ghost …
1. The ghost was a little girl.
2. The ghost was a male confederate soldier.
3. The ghost was an orphan.
4. The ghost lived in the home.
5. The ghost was protecting Tom from the Battle of Gettysburg.
6. The ghost was a doctor.
*blank stare*
We aimlessly wandered around the creaky old mansion asking several questions, snapping several photos and recording every second on our EVP recorder for the next 2 hours. The ghost hunting session finally wrapped and we were left with several unanswered questions. Do ghosts exist in the "haunted" Hoffman Mansion? Did we snap any photos of ghostly beings? Did we pick up any unexplained conversations on our EVP recorder? I guess we would have to wait for the professionals to review all of our data before we would get a solid answer.
Fast Forward 30 days. We eagerly checked our mailbox for the evidence that GPA had promised. It finally arrived.
We got a DVD that had a completely different group than our group. I didn't care about anyone else's night. Just my own. Needless to say that. was. a. waste.
We also got the EVP recording. It was a solid 2 hours of Tom and myself talking to the air and making fun of our fellow ghost hunters. (Let me take a brief moment to address my fellow ghost hunters … I won't say that I didn't mean the things that I was saying. I did. Every word. Don't say and/or do stupid things. You set yourself up for it. However, I will say that I am sorry that I was being recorded. Woops!)
We did get a couple pictures of some orbs. See below.
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| Orb number one. |
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| Orb number two. And something that resembles cat poo. |
So, in response to my title question, "Do you believe in Ghosts?" … I am still undecided. We didn't gather any solid evidence that pointed to a 'yes'. But, there were a couple incidents throughout the experience that definitely had me scratching my head in wonder. Could there be ghosts? Did we get to interact with them?
In conclusion, I will say that we did have a wonderful experience. I didn't pee my pants (thank goodness because that unlit fireplace wouldn't dry my hair OR my britches), cry like a big ol' baby or stare into a fuzzy TV screen looking for a poltergeist like Carol Ann. That being said, I'd like to consider our adventure a huge success. We would jump at the opportunity to do it all over again. It was never really about the evidence for me, anyway.
